That right, even though you may still have snow on the ground, springtime has arrived and it's time to celebrate the festivals of Eostre (any Australians about to give me lip about how it's actually fall there, shut up your hemisphere is the loser hemisphere shut up shut up shut up). Having survived the cold winter months, Easter is a time when we celebrate the returning warmth by getting naked in the bedroom and banging like rabbits.
Of course, the consequence of all this springtime sex is babies, symbolized by the chocolate eggs and bunnies we consume during these festivals. Endulge in all the cheap chocolate and unadulterated sugar you can find, Lent is over and it's time to start enjoying yourself again.
If you're wondering what all of this has to do with the resurrection of our lord and savior Jesus Christ, I ask you what evergreen trees have to do with the birth of a Jewish man in the Middle East.
Special shoutouts to Shaggy, who apparently is still performing.